Outside Looking In - Imperfect Disappointment Rewrite
by SlytherinServantChristine
Summary: Draco has always wanted to make Lucius proud. That's why he bullied and taunted the witches and wizards who differed from him. He thought he was making his father proud. Then Lucius got frustrated and started something Draco never wished he did: child abuse.


Chapter One - In The End

The faded scars that lay upon Draco Malfoy's arm stared up at him. His school trunk and broom was stored underneath his bed. The first day of school was to begin the next day, but it seemed like an eternity away for Draco. His stomach growled with a longing desire for food. Draco had now become depressed and as a result, hadn't eaten for weeks on end. His starvation levels were high, but he didn't care. The blame was on Lucius. Lucius was angry. He'd been working for Voldemort for years and not once had the dark lord praised Mr. Malfoy after accomplishing a mission. Lucius feared this may be because he had a son who didn't look up to him. So the blonde turned to drastic matters. He began to abuse Draco. The young Slytherin had been granted helpless as his father slapped, punched, and kicked him. So where did the scars come from? Eventually, Lucius decided that he wasn't causing enough pain. That's when he turned to using weapons. Draco had just wanted to be the perfect son. But he couldn't change his father's abusive personality. He'd thought that by taunting Harry Potter and his friends he could make his father proud. Lucius was not proud. In fact, found it pathetic that Draco taunted other children to make him proud. Draco would never admit to feeling pain, at least to his felt useless in this position. Eventually, he pulled back the covers and fell into a restless sleep.

The next morning, Draco sat alone in a compartment aboard the Hogwarts Express. He didn't mind being alone, in fact, he found it relaxing. Once he saw the surroundings outside flash past, he knew he had the compartment to himself. With that, he pulled out a tattered old notebook. The pages were torn and dusty and the binding would definitely need replacing. Opening it up, he turned to the first clean page he could find and after finding his best quill, began to write a journal entry.

_September 1st_

_For the first time, I feel more alone than ever. I don't understand what I did wrong, I don't know if I ever will. Why do I endure all this pain and abuse? Why does Father treat me like this? Why does Mother watch it happen? Because I won't be seen as weak. Because he is disappointed in me. Because she doesn't know how to help. I doubt anyone would, or would be brave enough to try.I often wonder if I should waste my breatn trying anymore. Is it worth it? - Draco Malfoy_

He slammed the journal shut as Ron Weasley approached the compartment.

''What's that?'' Ron asked, motioning to the journal. Draco glared.

''None of your concern, Weasley.'' He replied harshly. Draco shoved the journal into his trunk and walked away. Ron followed him.

''Spill it, Malfoy. What was it?'' Ron asked in a cold tone. Draco began to quicken his speed.

''Leave me alone, Weasley!'' He spat. Ron kept following him.

''What were you writing?''

''Stop pestering me!''

''What was it?''

''It's nothing!'' Draco snarled. Ron glared at the blonde Slytherin.

''Whatever. Malfoy.'' Ron turned and walked off. Draco sighed and leaned back against the wall, wishing it would all end.

'NOTHING LASTS FOREVER, I'M SORRY I CAN'T BE...PERFECT.' ~Simple Plan

Draco often wished his father still loved him the way he did when he was five.

* * *

_Five year old Draco looked on curiously as his father assembled what looked like a toy snake. The snake, from what Draco could see, was green and silver. Lucius picked up his son and set him down near the toy. Lucius grabbed the snake and placed it in the small hands of his only son. _

_''Draco, one day you shall attend school. Not just any school, but a special school. This snake represents the house that each and every Malfoy has been destined for. Son, this school is split into four houses. Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and your house, Slytherin. Slytherin is your house. The snake represents your house mascot. The green and silver represents your house colors.' Lucius said in a loving voice. Draco's eyes lit up as he played with the toy. _

_''I love it! Thank you, daddy!''_

_''You're welcome, son.''_

* * *

Draco let a single tear flow from his eye. People seemed to think he didn't have emotions just because he was in Slytherin. It was after dinner and Draco sat alone in the common room. Pansy came in and saw the desolate look on his face. Pansy was the only one he'd told about his situation.

''Draco, are you alright?'' Pansy asked. Acting as if he hadn't heard her, he stayed silent. Pansy sighed and kneeled down in front of him.

''Draco, we have to tell someone about this. You're not eating and you're extremely skinny.'' She said softly. Draco shook his head.

''No. We're not telling a soul about this.'' He said simply. Pansy frowned.

''Draco, I'm really worried about you. You'll die at this rate.''

''Good. Then he'll be happy.'' Draco stood and left out the portrait hole.

_''I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks.''_

_''There's not one witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin.''_

_''You foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach!''_

_''He's not worth it.''_

~The Golden Trio's words against Draco.

A/n: I really like this version better than the original. If you're new to this story and want to read the original of this story, go to my profile and click on the story titled ''Imperfect Disappointment.'' I think you guys will like this rewritten version a lot better! ~Christine


End file.
